And not because I’m jealous or bitter or upset, just because I knew it would mean that things would change.  I don’t want things to change.

I love all of my friends.  I would die inside if any of them got hurt or were taken away from me.  But I think I was always wary of you two getting feelings for each other.  I think I always knew it was there, that it would happen, but I didn’t want it to because I loved things like they were.  

I’m hurt you didn’t tell me.  I’m sad because everything is changing and I don’t like it.  I’m glad we are close enough we were able to seriously talk about it and I could see what was really going on from the source (thank you for that much).  But I’m worried about what the future holds, and I’m worried about how I’m going to feel about you now.  I don’t want to see you differently, but I also feel like I can’t control it.  

Maybe this is all just the estrogen talking.